My birth story!

My son's due date was Oct 9th so as we were drawing closer to the date we got more excited knowing that we would be meeting our son really soon. As the 9th came and passed, I got more sad and disappointed because I was so ready to meet my son. As days passed, I stopped talking to people, I stopped going places and I could barely do anything just because of how uncomfortable and in pain I was. The time came where I had to get an ultrasound done to see if things were still good which they were as he passed with flying colors and then time came to do my NST test and to talk about induction. He passed the NST test as well which I was so grateful for but I was so ready to meet him! That whole week I was having contractions on and off which defiantly made it tiring. During my NST test my midwife checked my cervix and it was soft which was exciting and so we ended up talking about induction and I decided that I would do the induction drink (midwife recommended) which included castor oil, almond butter and nector juice. She also recommended that Grant and I enjoy a nice supper before I took the drink. After the appointment we decided to go out and eat and during that time I was having consistent contractions. We then picked up all the ingredients for the drink and headed home to try and sleep before I took this drink. I woke up at 3am to take it and right after I finished the drink Contractions picked up and got more intense. We waited it out for about two hours and then decided to call my midwife. This was it, we were so excited because she and the birth photographer were on their way. We then started to fill up the pool that was in our living room and started to get things ready.

Once she came, she checked me and my cervix was softer than the night before. I got into the pool as things were starting to pick up. I never thought that I would end up having back labor so with every contraction, it felt like my hips and back were going to break. After a few hours in the pool, things weren't really progressing so I did some walking and tried some new positions during contractions which hurt so badly because of my back.  I ended up going back in the pool and just breathed and yes I screamed through my contractions. I tried to rest in between them but the longer the time in between, you know the more intense the next contraction would be.  I labored for a while on the toilet as it was a good position to help bring him down more as he was still up and not wanting to come down. We then decided to try saline shots that went into my back to see if they would help relieve pressure during my contractions which didn't end up working unfortunately. It's crazy how contractions literally take over your body. I wanted to give up so many times but I kept reminding myself that this is what I wanted and that I'd be holding my son in my arms soon, I just didn't know how soon. I remember during one contraction I yelled "I can do this" over and over again because I knew that I could do it.

My midwife decided to break my water and we were hoping things would progress or else I'd have to go to the hospital because he was being stubborn and didn't  want to come out. About half n hour to 45 minutes later things really turned around and I felt like I had to push, so We made our way into the bedroom and the midwife started to set her things up and she called the other midwife to come. Things were really progressing and it was the most craziest yet uncomfortable experience ever. They put a mirror down there so I got to watch his head slowly come out which was so crazy!

With every contraction I pushed and screamed knowing that I would meet my son very soon. Soon I started to throw up with every push and I'm surprised I didn't pop a blood vessel in my face!

Pushing for two hours is exhausting but so worth it. After a good hard push, his head came out and then his body wiggled out of me....literally wiggled out of me. The midwife has never seen a baby come out the way he did. They immediately placed him on my chest and that feeling of holding your baby for the first time is indescribable, no words can explain. We ended up doing delayed cord clamping as well which was wonderful.


I ended up having a 2nd almost 3rd degree tear because he came out with his arm by his head so we had to go to the hospital but before we did that, the midwives helped me get cleaned up and helped me out of the bed as I was exhausted and still trying to figure out what had just happened.

After 22 hours of all natural back labor and 2 hours of pushing, I would do it all over again.

After a year and a half of trying, two rounds of Clomid and 10 months of growing this wonderful miracle inside, we finally met our miracle baby and it was the greatest experience ever. Knowing that I can hold my baby anytime I want Is just Awesome! I am so blessed to be his Mother and I am excited for this new journey.

Landon Elliott Sawyer was born on Oct 22nd weighing 8lbs 13oz and was 21 and a half inches long. We couldn't be more excited ❤

Finding out we were pregnant!

As most of you know, we are having a baby!  It has been a long and emotional journey but it has been worth the wait. Some of you may not know but I ended up going on a fertility drug called "Clomid." Clomid is a fertility drug that can cause ovulation  (as I wasn't ovulating). It doesn't always work for alot of couples so we were fortunate. I went on the first round in Dec on my cycle day 3-7 and then on cycle day 21 I have to get my progesterone checked to see if I ovulated and unfortunately I didn't so we decided to try again in January and the thing with fertility meds is you have to plan everything out.....like when you will do the bd (baby dance). It is recommended that you have sex every other day starting the day after your period till your next cycle. After I tried clomid (Jan 6th- Jan 10th), I hoped and prayed that I would ovulate so right after I finished clomid, we started "trying." On Cycle day 19 I started cramping and had body aches but I kept monitoring it and I had body aches on cycle day 20 as well.  I went to get my progesterone checked on cycle day 21 and two days later I called my OB and my levels were at a 56.7 which is absolutely amazing and super high. I started getting a cold and I was constantly cramping and my period wasn't supposed to be due for another week , week and a half or whenever it was going to come but part of me kind of thought it was implantation cramping. My family decided to come down for the day on Jan 29th (cycle day 26) and after they left, I wanted to test so badly! I wasn't going to test till the middle of week but I felt like I should test. I tested on my cheap strips that I bought off Amazon and I saw something....a very very very faint line and I got so excited that I ended up taking a first response and once I dipped it, it started doing its thing and there was a second line! I can't tell you that feeling because it is so amazing to finally see a second line on a test!! To know that after everything we have been through, to know that there is a baby growing in me is the most amazing thing ever! We still don't know exactly when I ovulated but we know I ovulated early because I am farther along than I originally thought.  I am currently 17 weeks pregnant and my morning (all day) sickness is pretty much gone. I still get nauseous once in a while but I am so happy to have my appetite back.

We have a midwife and she is amazing! We also found out we are having a precious boy and we love him so much and we can't wait to meet him in 5 months. His due date is Oct 9th but I believe he will be a little early. I also didn't get morning sickness till I was 9 weeks.

My pregnancy symptoms when I found out I was pregnant were:
-Body aches
-Feeling sick
-Cramping
-Eating at midnight for about a week
-Tiredness

My current symptoms are:
-Hungry
-Tired but have spurts of energy
-Feeling flutters/tickles in my cervix
- Odd chest pressure
-Growing hair around my belly button

Besides some of the odd symptoms, I am loving being pregnant and knowing that our son is healthy and strong. Such an amazing miracle and gift from God.

It's hard to see the second line in the first one but it's just very faint.

 The first response is a little more clearer

For those who are still waiting.....

It's not easy writing this as I know what it feels like to wait and have no answers as to why God hasn't given you the answer yet but I am here today to tell you that He has answered. It may not be the answer you are looking for or wanting but that is when faith and trust come into place more than ever and I don't want to give you the lecture of "Be patient, it will happen" or "You still have plenty of time" because those sentences...those words hurt deeply. 

I always thought it would be easy but God had different plans. I thought once I got married, I would get pregnant right away and start a family right away but that certainly wasn't the case. My husband and I tried for 18 months and those long months came with lots of tears, evap lines and missed periods but after 16 months of trying, I got diagnosed with PCOS and Hypothyroidism and that was my missing puzzle piece into why I wasn't getting pregnant. After 6 months with no period and then randomly bleeding straight for almost 4 months was brutal. I found out that I had no uterine lining and super low progesterone and that's what was causing me to constantly bleed. I started pills and it finally stopped. In Novemeber (when I got diagnosed with PCOS and Hypothyroidism) I started thyroid pills which have been amazing and they also prescribed Clomid which I would start on my next period on CD 3 (Cycle Day 3)  for 5 days. I started my period in December 2016 which then I started Clomid and for those who have been on it,you know what I mean when I say...the side effects are brutal and it is alot of work because you can't just take the pills and wait. You have to plan and have sex on certain days if not everyday so you can hit those peak days on ovulation and hope that it worked.  I later found out that round didn't work and I was discouraged and sad because I wanted it to work so badly but we decided to give it another try for January and we found out that it worked and I cam currently almost 17 weeks pregnant which is an incredible blessing...BUT I am not here to tell you my story. I am here to tell all of those who have been trying for months or years that you are not alone. I cried whenever I saw a pregnancy announcement on social media because I wanted that to be me. I know that all of you understand that it's painful and hard to see that, to see that your friends/family get to have this miracle growing inside them instead of you. I had a hard time and still am having a hard time posting pregnancy statuses and bump pictures on social media because I know alot of you are hurting and don't want to see that, so when I post things, I am not trying to stuff it in your face, I am just sharing my journey and I want you to know that hope is coming and one of my favorite blogs is about how God is making your baby! He is preparing you for the greatest journey but He is waiting for the perfect time to give you this amazing blessing and someday you may or may not find all the puzzle pieces and that is okay.  It's okay to feel like giving up. Sometimes you need a break from trying and that is perfectly okay, there is nothing wrong with that. Just because it's taking a little extra longer doesn't make you any less of a Woman or human being, it just means that you are strong and you are capable of doing this! You've got this and remember you are not alone. I pray for each and everyone who is struggling with infertility because it's not easy. It is one of the hardest things to go through. God's got you in His arms and He won't let go. Through your journey, He is with you <3

"Still" by Hillary Scott

"I believe that You are God alone
But sometimes I still try to take control
Cause I get scared when I can't see the end
And all You want from me is to let go"

"You're parting waters
Making a way for me
You're moving mountains that I don't even see
You've answered my prayer before I even speak
All You need for me to be is still
Be still"

What is PCOS?

Most of you have already read my last post about how I have been diagnosed with PCOS and for those who don't know what it is, I will try my best to explain it to you! PCOS symptoms include:
-Weight gain
-Diabetic issues
-Cysts on the ovaries
-Not ovulating
-hair growth
-Fertility issues
-irregular periods
-Mood swings
-Depression
-Acne
-Water retention
-Skin tags


I also have hypothyroidism and the side effects for those are:
-Fatigue
-Being cold all the time
-Weight Gain
-Puffy Face
-Irregular Periods
-Depression

Out of all these symptoms, I have weight gain, insulin issues, cysts, not ovulating, fertility issues, irregular periods, mood swings, depression, being cold all the time, puffy face, fatique, skin tags and water retention.  Having the weight gain is a super tough one especially having PCOS because carbs and sugar doesn't digest very well. I am not going to go into detail with that as it is very confusing! I am on metformin to help my insulin levels and I am on Synthroid for my thyroid and with my thyroid meds I have noticed more energy which is great. I stopped taking metformin for a while as it is really hard on the body. When you eat lots of carbs and sugar while taking metformin, you get really bad side effects such as constant diarrhea, nausea, sore stomach, sour stomach and sometimes throwing up. I was on a super high dose at first and I was puking almost every night and I was in the bathroom for quite a few hours a day....it was NOT fun! I decided to cut down the dosage and I started it again today so hoping to see good results with that. That is why I am going to start a good healthy diet and start good exercise, I have said that before and I haven't followed through but I am so ready to start healing my gut and start getting on track. Hoping this makes a little more sense to some of you.  Having PCOS is not fun, it's emotionally and physically tiring but I am hoping that in this next year I will have more energy and that I will be on a good track. Since I have PCOS, I have hormonal imbalance and I am hoping to see my hormones balance out this next year!

I am going to go and drink a good smoothie!

Hope you all have an amazing Christmas!

Mikayla

Getting ready for Christmas and the New Year!

Hey everyone! Happy December, can't believe Christmas is two weeks away! We have finished all of our Christmas shopping and I am just finishing up all of my Christmas baking.

Last post, I was wishing and hoping for a period and well I got it! I ended up starting on the last day of November and I am excited to announce that it started and ended on its own! So much excitement here. The day I started my period, I had a health scare, I was in so much pain. The pain wouldn't go away, it was constant and I couldn't even stand up. I was so close to passing out. Anyways, we think I ended up passing my uterine lining and that is why I was in so much pain. Thank The Lord I am feeling better :) I also found out I have hypothyroidism so I am on thyroid pills, and the great thing about these pills is I have so much energy. I haven't noticed much weight wise but am hoping too soon! I got told two weeks ago that I have PCOS which is hard but I know kind of what I have to do. The first thing is to start a good diet and by doing that I have to eliminate the bad carbs, sugar, pop and many more things BUT the good news is, I can still eat most fruit :) My body is in need of so much healing, and I can't wait to start this healing journey and process.  I am going to be a new me in 2017 and I am so excited about it :)

Sorry for the post about my health but things are looking up and it is amazing and we are so excited about it.  I couldn't have gone through all of this without my Husband as well as God. I have a long journey ahead of me but I am excited and nervous to go along this journey.

Thank you for all of your support and prayers!

Hope you all have a Merry Christmas! :)


Mikayla

All I want for Christmas is a.......

Hey everyone! Christmas is just around the corner! Have you finished all your Christmas shopping and decorating? We are almost done shopping and we are all decorated for the holidays. Christmas is my favorite time of year, we reflect on Jesus'  birth and we get to spend time with Family and Friends and there is a special feeling we all get at Christmastime that you just can't describe. Snow, warm apple cider and Christmas Carols are just a few of my favorite things at Christmas.

As most of you know, this year has been crazy for Grant and I and my health has been all over the place. I started bleeding in July and I forced myself to finish at the end of October. I finally saw an OBGYN and he said that my progesterone levels were a 2.4 when they should be at 16 and my insulin levels were high. Since my progesterone levels were so low, I had no uterine lining so my body just kept bleeding because I didn't have a uterine wall to keep it inside. The Dr put me on a high dose of progesterone pills as well as metformin for my insulin. The day I started my progesterone pills, I stopped bleeding which was wonderful and exciting but I haven't had a period since and I don't know when I will get a period again. I go and see my Dr again at the end of November and hopefully I will get some more info BUT all I want for Christmas is a period....yes I want a period. I am tired of not knowing what is going on with my body. If I get a period then hopefully my body will hopefully start getting on track. The side effects of both of these pills are not the best either so that has been another downfall. I am just nervous about what will happen when I get off these pills!!

Anyways there is an update but besides my health, I am so excited for Christmas and I can't believe it's almost here! Hope you have a wonderful Christmas :) 


Mikayla

Health update!

Hey guys, hope everything is going well and I trust that your summer went well! Our summer went by very fast! I had Weddings to photograph and we attended weddings and we went camping, it was also our 1 year Wedding anniversary, my birthday and I got my license. Needless to say, we had a busy summer.

As most of you know I didn't have a period from Jan-July and it was between July 15th-17th that I got my period....out of the blue! Grant and I were so happy because this was a huge step in order to try for a baby! A week went by, then two weeks went by and I was still bleeding, it was veey minimal but I was still bleeding. A month went by, then two months went by and now I am currently going into my fourth month of having a period. The past few weeks have been the hardest, emotionally and physically wise and my period is causing me to have no energy and making me feel sick.  I had went to my Dr and he told me to maybe try birth control (again) or try Metformin but I didn't wait to do either so he booked me for a gynecologist appointment which takes place in a week....Praise The Lord!! We are just hoping to find the right answers.

My bleeding got so bad last week that we decided to go to the hospital and after waiting  for hours, the Dr at the hospital prescribed me these pills that is supposed to stop my bleeding! I started them today and I can't wait to finally stop bleeding!!

Thank you for all of your support and encouragement through this time, it means alot! I will continue to keep you updated!

Mikayla

Bought an Ovulation Kit.....what?!!?!!

As most of you know,  I am not heading to Africa now. I feel like this was the best decision for Grant and I as I can now be home and support him and we also feel like it's the season to try for babies!!! We are so excited, though we still have to get my health figured out. I start my period July 15th which was so exciting but I still have it, and it's been a month. I am seeing the Endocrinologist in September and also I am starting Fertility Acupuncture in the fall! Yippeeeee! This will most likely be a long journey but it may not be either. I bought an Ovulation kit the other day so I am very excited to start trying it and we are just hoping and praying I am ovulating.  We are excited to start this journey together and we are excited to have God leading us. We couldn't do it without him or without all of you guys as well! We are so blessed to have all of you in out lives! We feel like this is the next step and we are so excited and scared but we know that we can do this and we pray that we can be an example and help others who are going through the same thing.




Mikayla

It's not my time yet....

Over the past 11 and a half months, I have come to the fact that it's okay...... It's not my time, not yet. 


As most of you know I was on birth control for a few months and I decided to go off of it about 2 weeks after I get married because I knew it would take me a while to get pregnant. We started "trying" even though it's kind of hard thing to plan as I never knew when my period was going to start and I never knew when I was going to ovulate either. I got so excited when my period was late that we bought pregnancy tests and only to figure out that it would be negative and then my period would start the next day. This happened till January when little did I know that my period would all of a sudden stop! I immediately thought I was pregnant because when February rolled around, I had no period. I took multiple tests thinking this is it, I am pregnant! I then took a test and it looked positive so I told Grant that we were expecting....I ended up getting blood work later that day only to find out it was negative again. The second line was an evaporated line. My heart broke because we got so excited! A few weeks later, still no sign of my period so I took another test and I ended up getting more blood work done again just to make sure....and again it was negative. I had planned out all these ideas about how we were going to tell family. Usually the first sign of pregnancy is a missed period and well a few months had gone by and I had no period. My heart kept breaking and I was crying so much because I wanted to be pregnant so badly and I see all of my friends getting pregnant really fast and I questioned myself..."why" "why wasn't I getting pregnant?"

I was still wondering why I haven't gotten my period or why I am not ovulating. We still don't really know why I am not getting my period. It may be due to my Thyroid or PCOS. Hoping to know soon.

I have came to the realization that it's okay. As much as I want to be pregnant right now and to have a baby, it's okay. God has a bigger picture and he knows better than Grant and I do. It's still hard for me seeing my friends getting pregnant and having kids but I am happy for you! Children are a blessing. I know my time will come but it's not time yet. I have to wait patiently and trust in His timing.

At church on Sunday, Pastor K was taking about Sarah and Abraham from the bible and how they were unable to have children but God blessed them. ~Genesis 17 & 18 talks more about it.

While he was preaching on this sermon, I felt peace and I told Grant after the service that I felt like God was talking to me. God is telling me to wait patiently and to trust Him. While I wait, I will go to Uganda and see all the Children God has blessed me with there. They have my heart and I love each and everyone of those Children. I can't wait to hug them all. They call me Aunty and Mommy and they have the most beautiful smiles and the most contagious laughs ever. I can't wait to squeeze them and to hold their hand :)

"Your world's not falling apart, it's falling into place." ~Just be held by Casting Crowns.

"Rejoice in Hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer." Romans 12:12

Just because we are going through this, doesn't mean we should be sad all the time and discouraged but we should be thankful and praise our wonderful Lord and Savior for blessing Grant and I with one another as well as the gift of hope, love and faith!  Remember, He knows what's best for us even when we don't.

Mirrors lie

This is a tough topic for me to write as I still struggle and will most likely continue to struggle about how I look. 

Here is my story:

About 3 years ago, I weighed 94lbs and I was able to look good in everything and then I went on birth control (March 2015) a few months before I got married (July 2015) so I wouldn't get my period for my wedding and a few months in, taking these pills, I checked my weight and I was at 115lbs which I was fine with but then when July came around, my wedding dress barely fit and I went up 3 bra sizes. I went off the pill just two weeks after the wedding because I wanted to start trying for kids even though due to health problems (cysts on my ovaries) I wouldn't get pregnant for a while. I checked my weight and it was at just over 130lbs which was crazy and I kept gaining weight and now I weigh 160lbs which I absolutely hate because my clothes don't fit anymore. Anyways, I haven't had a real period since January but I did have a forced period in May due to progesterone pills I was taking for 5 days and after that period I still don't have one. I had a radioactive iodine treatment on June 15th to see if this will regulate everything but we will see what happens. The past few months have been super tough, my self confidence has gone down hill where I just want to wrap myself in a blanket and hide in a hole and never come out. Whenever I look into the mirror I hear "You are ugly, you have a fat face, you have a double chin, you're not skinny enough, your husband isn't going to love you, you have too many stretch marks." Let me just begin with this, I have tried tons of diets, I have fasted from certain foods, and even though me gaining weight isn't really in my control as my health is triggering it, it doesn't make it any easier. Hopefully soon, I can figure out why I am gaining this weight.

I break down in tears and I become depressed and I usually am like that after I try and go shopping or after I look in the mirror.  Yes, I believe those lies. It's easier to believe lies than the truth isn't it?  We are so hard on ourselves because we believe everything the mirror says and we don't believe in ourselves.  I am going to be honest but it makes sex harder and it makes it harder to enjoy sex because we are so focused on our bodies and are scared to share our bodies with our husbands as we are afraid they aren't going to love us. I know all about that, I experience it all the time and it hurts me because I want to look skinny and perfect for my husband but the truth is NOBODY is perfect. Fake people and barbies are made out of plastic and botox!!! My husband doesn't just love my body but he loves what's on the inside; the heart! He protects me, and guards me. He cherishes me because I am made and designed by the creator of this earth.

Usually I will walk out of the bathroom in tears but my hubby always says this to me " You are God's daughter, he makes EVERYTHING beautiful and I love you and my love will never change for you. I am here and we are going to work this out and I will be by your side through it all." Is that hard for me to believe? Yes it is because I want go give him a good looking tall, skinny woman and I am none of those..... I may struggle with self confidence all my life but I know this for a fact, I am beautiful, I am unique and I am made in God's image. God doesn't make anyone or anything ugly because He makes everything in His image.

Next time you look in the mirror, tell yourself that you are beautiful, that you are worth more than Gold, that God loves you and that He created you in His own image.


1 Peter 3:3-4 "Your beauty should not come from outward appearance , such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is great worth in God's sight."

Psalm 139:14 "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."

You are beautiful!!!!

God's timing is perfect

Hi there,

This post will be about events that have happened this past month!

I don't quite know where to begin but on June 4th, my hubby and I photographed out first wedding. It was an exciting, joyful, tiring and amazing day. Needless to say, I think I will go into wedding photography because I loved it so much. That same weekend, my parents got a new puppy "Sasha." She is a 2 month old black lab and is the most adorable thing ever. With that being said, Grant really wants a dog haha!

That week consisted of editing photos and getting things ready for a birth I was going to photograph and the baby was coming any day so I had to be prepared. On June 12th I got a call saying my client's water broke and she was about to give birth, so I booked it out of the house and photographed the most beautiful thing ever....Weddings are beautiful too but do not compare to seeing a baby entering into this world. I can't even describe the emotions that I felt as well as what my client's felt. It was a totally unplanned birth, as she was supposed to have a hospital birth but the baby was coming so fast, she had to deliver at home. She gave birth to a healthy baby boy who might I add is the cutest thing ever! Afterwards, I had to process everything because it went so fast as well as I couldn't believe I actually did this! Not only did I photograph a birth but I watched it and it was so beautiful. Later that evening, I, of course had to start editing, and couldn't sleep until I got most of the editing done because if you know me, I can't sleep until I edit. Tuesday rolled around and I got to photograph their Family/Newborn photos. Through this, some amazing things have happened, for one, I have made a friend and I am so blessed because I have been having a hard time for the past year as I haven't really made any friends and I get emotional talking about it but I am so happy and blessed to say that I have made a lifelong friend. Isn't it amazing and yet mind boggling that God's timing is always perfect!! Ecclesiastes 3:1 says it all "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens."

God is just SO amazing, I feel humbled, blessed, overjoyed, and full of emotions when I think of how amazing He is.

As I get ready to photograph another wedding in two weeks, I have to make sure I take the time to breathe because before you know it, summer will come to an end.

As you read this, remember that God's timing is always perfect even when it feels like it isn't and it feels like your life is falling apart, there is a bigger picture and we may never find the answers to why certain things happen but remember "Thy will be done." (Check out Thy will by Hillary Scott).

Mikayla Sawyer

Let's face it....Sex in the movies, it's not real!

O.k don't freak out! Of course sex in the movies is not real because they are acting for the camera and they usually don't have an intimate connection with each other. This topic has been on my mind lately about how sex in the movies makes it look so romantic and how everything goes smoothly...pfft! Give me a break! Yes, sex is supposed to be an intimate adventure between a Husband and Wife and you have that connection and bond between each other that makes you stronger as a couple as well as it makes you love your spouse more but let's face it, things happen and there are a lot of things that the movies don't tell you about sex.
1. It's messy!
~Be prepared to clean up after! Don't fall asleep right after sex like they do in the movies, because it's messy and you don't want to have to change your sheets every time you have sex!

2. You're body can make weird noises!
~Yes, it's not all quiet, your stomach can growl, you may burp or fart (depending on what you just ate before having sex). It may not be attractive at all but it's funny and you just have to laugh. Don't be embarrassed!

3. You don't always get turned on at the same time!
 ~ If you have heard "Women are like crockpot's and Men are like light switches," it can be true! Woman can take time to heat up. Take it slow and enjoy it.

4. It can be awkward...and it can hurt. Just sayin'
~Yes, that's right, it can be awkward! This kind of ties into #2 about how your body can make weird noises. Trying new positions, or you forgot to put deodorant on...oops! If you can get past these awkward stages, you're good to go! There are days where it can hurt and it can totally be a turn off. Relax and enjoy!

Making love to each other is another great blessing that God has blessed us with to be able to share it with your spouse. Try something new, spice up your marriage and just have fun.

I can't believe I just wrote that and I have only been married for 8 months...I have learned a lot and I will continue to learn more and more.

 Have a blessed and wonderful day!

Mikayla Sawyer
xoxo

Starting a new journey

This is it, usually if I start a "diet" or I start to change my eating habits, I end up going back to the way I used to eat. I don't eat terrible, I eat my fruits and veggies, I barely drink pop/juice and I don't eat a lot of chips or chocolate bars but starting Monday Feb 1st, I am starting a new journey. I won't be eating, breads such as tortillas, bread, waffles, pancakes, crepes, pizza pops, noodles, etc. I won't be drinking pop, juice or alcohol of any kind and I won't be eating sweets such as chocolate, baking, candy etc and I am going to fill my plate with more protein, gluten free foods, fruits and veggies. I will also be working out everyday, I have multiple routines that I am excited to try to help me get fit.

The reason I am doing this is because I have health issues that the doctors still can't figure out and It's hard for me to lose weight and It's hard for me to have lots of energy. I get about 8-10 hours of sleep and I usually have a nap in the afternoon at some point and I am tired of being tired, literally. I want to get processed junk out of my body and fill it with good and healthy foods.

When I have temptations to eat junk food or cravings just to have one sip of pop, I will fill that time with prayer and give it up to God, I want to be full with the Holy Spirit and I want to, want to crave for his word. Reading the bible and praying shouldn't be a chore, it should become part of our daily routine to spend time with God, he loves it when we spend time with him.

I don't know how long I will be doing this for, it could be a week, a month or a year. I will be starting with a week and then after a week, I will write a post about how I feel and go from there. I am excited and nervous to start this new journey! Prayers would be appreciated. Thank you


Mikayla Sawyer

Preparing for a mission trip as a Married couple

Warning: This post will be a long one!  I can't believe I am writing this and even though it's still a year away, I am trying to get into the mindset of going onto another mission trip and this time I am going with my husband. How amazing is that? I am super excited and thrilled to go back to Africa and to serve God with my husband. This is going to be a huge marriage strengthener! This next year is going to be crazy, busy and yet amazing. As we get prepared to go onto this mission trip as a couple, we need to first fully commit ourselves to God and let him take control. He is the one that is going to do the work on this trip, we are his hands and feet so we will show God's love through his actions. Isn't God amazing?!

"Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome in power
Our God, Our God"

"Into the darkness you shining
Out of the ashes we Rise
No one like you
None like you" ~Our God/Chis Tomlin~

God has a plan for each and everyone of us, and he a has a purpose for everything we do , even when it doesn't make sense. God puts certain people together to do his will. We are going to meet new people and we are going to do new things but as we embark on this journey, God is going to be with us and he is going to do something amazing. I can feel it already! Yes, this trip is going to be so powerful in so many ways. 

We are going into the darkest places but through God we are going to rise up and show God's love in the darkest moments and we are going to see people get transformed; not just the people that we are going to see but the team will also get transformed.  

I can't prepare for the return to come home because it is painful and emotional (I will write another post abut that). 

Are you rooted in Jesus Christ?

"Greater is He, that is living in me. He's conquered our enemy. No power of darkness, no weapon prevails, we stand here in victory" ~Same Power/Jeremy Camp~

Wow!!!! When we arrive in Africa and we see the hurt and the sickness, we know that this is not the end! We stand in victory because we know that God conquered our enemy a long time ago.  God is bigger than any disease! God is healing, he is using us to again to be his hands and feet. 

As we get prepared a year in advance, we just pray that everything will come together, and if it's God's will, things will come together and It's going to be amazing. We are super thrilled and so excited! I am so anxious because I just want to go now, I have been to Uganda three times and I can't wait to see their beautiful faces again!! Eeeek! As we wait for next January/February, we remember that we can be witnesses here and we can share God's love here also as we wait.

Well, I could go on and on and I could keep typing forever but I will be writing another post soon anyways if ya'll could pray for us, that would be amazing!

Remember, God loves you :)

 

Struggling with my self confidence

I haven't always struggled with self confidence till a few years ago. I used to weigh 96lbs and I was healthy and I felt and looked good and over the past few years my weight has started to stick to my body and being 4"11, you can't hide the weight that is being piled on your body. It's so hard to deal with. Some of you may not know but I was 1lb 13oz when I was born so I was a Preemie baby so I think that's why I am so tiny/short. Anyhow, over the past few years my health has kind of spiraled downwards with having cysts in my left ovaries and finding out that I may have hyper thyroid and it can be hard to live with sometimes. A few months I went on the pill because my period isn't regular and I didn't want to have it when I got married but right after the wedding I went off the pill as it was hard for my body. During those few months my body changed a lot. I went up three sizes in my bra, I gained more weight in my belly, arms and face. I have stretch marks on my belly, legs and arms. I feel so uncomfortable in my body! I don't eat a lot of sugar or bread and yet I keep gaining weight even when I am off the pill. I bought a scale (I don't know why I did) and I decided to weigh myself and I just about cried when I saw what it said....I was and still am 155lbs. My hands are puffy so I can't wear my wedding rings. My calves are puffy so I can't wear boots and there are days where I don't even want to get out of bed because of my body. I don't get it. I am hoping to get pills for my thyroid and I am hoping and praying that my weight will slowly drop but....I am beautiful, I am God's daughter and he doesn't make mistakes! We are made in his image, we have to take care of our bodies and make sure we don't misuse it or trash our bodies by giving it unhealthy stuff. 

Girls and guys, you are beautiful/handsome and are made in the image of God!

"You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you." Song of Solomon 4:7

 "I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works, my soul knows it full well." Psalm 139:14

"But let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quite spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." 1 Peter 3:4

Understanding your Husband's needs

I got married July 25th 2015 and after we got married, I learned alot of new and different things about my husband and I will always continue to learn new things about him. If we knew everything about each other, admit it, marriage would boring, life would be boring! That's what is so great about marriage, we get to unwrap a new present everyday and and learn something new about each other. It can be scary, embarrassing or can be really neat. We are two completely different people yet we are one. My husband needs attention, he needs to know that I love him and that I am here for him and that I am never going to leave him. He needs that security that everything will be okay.

I don't like to show him that I am worried because then he will get worried and will get stressed and I don't want to see him that way. He needs to know that I am his support, spiritual, physical and emotional. He needs to know that I am praying for him and praying for our marriage and that we will strive to be more like Christ everyday. He needs to know that I will take care of him, feed him, wash his clothes and that I will put Christ first. He needs to know that I love him and that God is our strength and our provider all the time, not just when things are tight but when things are going really well! 

Yes it bugs me if he leaves his socks in the middle of the living room or if he leaves his bowl and spoon on the table or if he leaves crumbs in the bed but I know that he is trying his best, he provides for me and eventually a family and I couldn't be happier to be married to an amazing man! 

Sometimes I feel like I fail as a wife because I say things like "Those dishes can wait till tomorrow, or sorry hunny I forgot to wash your favorite shirt." or I"ll forget to wash the bathroom or when he gets home the  house is a mess and all I felt like doing that day was eat chocolate, cry and watch netflix but then I realize, I don't fail as a wife, I just had a day where I don't want to face the world and I just need to feel God's peace and know that everything will be okay. My hubby is not going to love me any less because I wore pj's all day. In fact, he loves me more because he knows that I am trying my best and he knows that I love him.

I love being a wife and somedays it's a lot of work but yet it's so  rewarding because I know that I am loved by my Heavenly Father and am taken by the most amazing Husband ever!


xoxo
Mikayla Sawyer

I'm a wife

Wow, I can't even describe how amazing being a wife is. I am just going to back up here a little!

On July 25th 2015, I married the most amazing man ever! The week before the wedding was crazy, we had a family reunion, and had family staying with us which was awesome but what really wasn't good was I got sick. I had a nasty cold and a few days before the wedding I lost my voice! That was terrible and the day before the wedding I was feeling not the best but God gave me health for our wedding day! I remember the day before the wedding, getting my nails done, finished setting up the hall, and setting up the church with decorations and then came the rehearsal..I was so nervous but after the rehearsal I was so happy and and confident and I just wanted to get married already.

Wedding day!!

I woke up and and actually ate breakfast, got ready to go down a 1,000 foot waterslide which was tons of fun! When I got back, I got my make-up and hair done, got my dress on and veil. We made it to the church and we got married!! I will never forget the feeling of finally being married :) We went and got some pictures done at the lake and on our way to the hall for the reception we got stuck in a massive thunderstorm which was a huge blessing. The reception was awesome, we incorporated a few African traditions which made me happy! Overall, we couldn't have asked for anything better and we are so blessed by everyone!

Being a wife is amazing, I love making supper and cleaning the house and waiting for Grant to come home from work. There are struggles but with God we can do anything together!

Being a bride-to-be!

I can't describe to you the amazing feeling knowing that you belong to someone! Being God's daughter and then having a man who is after God's heart loving you unconditionally! Ever since I was a little girl, I always knew I wanted to get married and to have a Prince Charming! Then that day came when I got asked an important question,  and of course I said "yes!" My dream is coming true, I get to marry the love of life! Planning a wedding is lots of fun but it can bring tears and eventually it can be overwhelming! As we are are getting married next month, I am feeling very overwhelmed by the fact that I'm starting my life with my man and im
Moving and will be living in a new city!  So many emotions!

Being a bride to be is such an amazing privilege and such a blessing! I am honestly so blessed to be marrying an amazing Godly man! God has truly given me a treasure! Knowing that I get to be a wife and eventually a mom is just another incredible blessing! I pray that we will have a Christ like marriage and that we will have unconditional love for eachother and for our one true love God! I also pray that the excitement we have now to get married that we will have the same excitement for when Jesus comes back to take his bride "us" to heaven to be with him for eternity!  I don't know what marriage is like but I know that it is an incredible blessing from God and we have to treasure it and guard it!

My prayer for all of the engaged couples and even married couples is that you guard your marriage and that you will love eachother unconditionally and keep Christ in the centre of his amazing blessing!

I miss it....

I  was really missing Uganda today. One of my favorite songs came on the radio this morning called "Overwhelmed" by Big Daddy Weave and God sure knows when I need to hear that song because it comes on when I need to hear it. That songs reminds me of how amazing God is and how amazing His love is but it also reminds me of my home in Uganda, Africa. I am so overwhelmed by their love for God as well as their love for us. 

We "Power Team" have been back for two months already and God has shown our team so many things and have blessed us! 

Coming back this time was hard which it gets harder every year but this year was a little harder because as I am getting married this summer, I'm not sure when I'll be going back, the past few years I was able to say "count me in, I'm going next year." Whereas this year, God only knows when or if I'll ever go back which hopefully I do. I couldn't stand living the rest of my life not going back to Uganda. 

There are days where I literally just want to hide from the world because we have EVERYTHING...we have money, food, clothes, houses, cars, jobs and do you know what I see wherever I go? Grumpy people who complain because their apples weren't as sweet as the last batch or they are returning unopened food at because they don't need it or don't like the taste. Really?!  It's rediculous and really sad. I go to a Uganda and do you know what I see? I see people praising The Lord because He has blessed them with a new chair or clean water, even a new pair of pants. I see people who give their guests all the food that they have where if they take it to the market they could sell it for some money but instead they give it to us. Whenever we would go visit a family, they would be singing and praising The Lord because they were overwhelmed to see us and they were so happy because they know that God is watching over them. Yes we see some sad things such as dying kids, kids who can't eat or drink clean water. People who can't afford to get treatment from the hospital, people who live in small tiny huts with 10 kids and only 1 blanket. It's sad but we know that God is doing some amazing work! 

While we are trying to buy the next best thing, someone is trying to buy one banana.  Yes I would like a better camera or I would love to buy a bigger phone but I'm going to be patient and wait for those things, I don't need them, I want them. I'm not going to waste me money on things like that but instead I'm giving my money to God and saving it up for my next trip to Uganda whenever that will be. 

I was in the food court just a few days after I got back and while I was there I cried and I cried because as I was looking around trying to figure out a place get food, I literally was ready to run out of there and hide because there were so many options of food and yet I had just stopped eating the same thing for 17 days which I won't complain because it's good but I was so hurt because there is so much food here yet people there eat the same thing over and over again for years and years, they don't have the variety of foods we have here. 

It's almost a culture shock coming back because like I said earlier we have everything wheras they don't have much! If we brought 5 Africans here, they would probably go in a huge shock because they wouldn't know how to contain themselves and they would feel completely lost. 

As we live our lives, let's be thankful for what we have and not be grumpy people who complains about everything. Let's enjoy life. Remember that when we leave the tap running, someone is dying because they can't have clean water. 

God loves YOU sooooo much!!!

I can't begin to tell you how much God loves you....he made you, he died on the cross for you...he LOVES you!!!

- I am getting the chills right now writing this, God just amazes me sooo much! Does he amaze you? What amazes you about God? Is it the ground we walk on, the beauty in the scenery such as mountains, rivers, animals?

Go look in the mirror, what do you see? Do you see just some person who doesn't think their beautiful or handsome? Do you see a person who has no worthy or who doesn't think they belong in this world, or who doesn't feel loved?

Let me tell you something....God knitted you together in your mother's womb! He carefully put every piece together and he spent time making you!



Psalm 139:13-17 says
"For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
    when I was made in the secret place,
    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
    all the days ordained for me were written in your book
    before one of them came to be."

How awesome is that?

Romans 5:8 
"But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

Luke 12:7
"Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows"

You are worth more than Gold and God knows your name and what is on your heart. He loves you!!!! 


John 3:16 says

"For God loved so loved the world that he gave his one and only son that whoever believes in him will not die but have eternal life."

Next time you look in the mirror, examine yourself and remember that God made every inch of you!